To the guy who killed my brother

To the guy who killed my brother,

Murderer! Is not who you are and deep down inside I truly believe that you are afraid, in shock, confused and on a rollercoaster of emotions. Your actions have my family feeling the same and so much more. We are angry, heartbroken, distraught. Some of us are in a place of despair, frustrated and feeling as if we've been dealt a bad hand. To you, I'll call you guy, I pray and hope that you have befriended my Lord and savior Jesus Christ.

Never before have I felt such heartache and pain. It's as if my heart is being crushed. My older brother wasn't perfect and none of us are. But he spent a good part of his life putting others before himself. He was a son, a little brother, a big brother, the "world's best uncle", a friend and so much more. Most importantly Erwins was a child of God. Therefore he is not only good but the first chapter of Genesis ensures us that he was created very good. Guy, the same goes for you.

I don't know your upbringing, I don't know where you're at spiritually. In fact, I know nothing about you besides the fact that my brother died at the doing of your hands. What I do know is that there is a man by the name of Jesus Christ, who is the God of gods, the Lord of lords. He is the King of the universe and he is madly in love with you. When I heard about my brother's death I cried like I have never cried before. Yes, I cried, because I'm going to greatly miss my brother. But what was really killing me was the fact that I wasn't sure if my brother fully accepted that love from Jesus Christ nor if he fully understood it. However, in hope, I pray that the seconds before he passed from this world to the next, that our good God revealed himself to him in a new way.

Guy, I am mad at you. In fact, I am extremely angry, but in all honesty I do not hate you. Because of my love for Jesus and His love for you,  I too can say that I love the man that has caused me the most pain that I have ever felt. Guy, it is not too late: "repent and believe in the gospel". Come fast to the Lord. He awaits you, the Church awaits you, I, your brother in Christ, await you. Maybe you already know the Lord and have a relationship with him. If you do, praise God.  Either way, my invitation remains the same: Make amends, seek the Lords mercy, and draw yourself closer to him.

Guy, I am writing to you not because I believe I am better, not because I want my blog to be popular but I am writing to you because you deserve it. You deserve salvation, you deserve to know that Jesus Christ loves you and you deserve to inherit life everlasting.

It's been a month since my brother's death and it's been a long month. Throughout this month I've prayed a lot, and I've questioned God, "why now, why like this and why at the hands of a little 5 ft nothing, 24 years old punk." It's taken a whole month for me to look at you as a person and as a son of God. I, as the brother of the victim, want justice and that would be for you to be locked up for a very long time, if not forever. We know, however, that our ways are not the ways of God so what does God's justice look like. That I do not know but I pray to know. I also pray the the greatest hurt that I've ever felt could be taken away. I pray that the tears in my parents eyes would be dried up. And finally I pray for God's help, wisdom, strength, consolation, and comfort in all of this. My life is forever changed because of your actions. However, I can let your actions build me up and make me into who it is that God desires me to be and in turn impact the world with my experience and story. Or, I can let it bring me to the ground and be angry at you for the rest of my life. If I choose the second option, you win and the devil wins and that is not an option. In my life, God wins every time, even in a confusing and difficult circumstance like this. God is and always will be victorious.

To God be the Glory!

May the divine assistance remain always with us,

Amen

And may the souls of the faithful departed (Especially that of Erwins Albert) through the mercy of God, rest in peace,

Amen.

Trusting in God's Mercy,

Paul Alain Albert

Little brother of Erwins Albert

My Brother and I on My wedding day, he was my Best Man.